I Want to Fight My Soul So What Is The Way?

Author: Nawwal Bint Abdullaah
Source: Trans. Abu Iyaad

All Praise is due to Allaah the Rabb of all the Worlds and prayers and peace upon the best creation of Allaah.

To proceed:

We hear many complaints from the people. Most of their complaints are related to their souls, which command them what is evil. They also complain about the evil of their actions. One of them says:

Indeed I have been put to trial with four, they did not afflict me
Except due to my misfortune and wretchedness
Iblees, the world, the soul and the desire
How will this end when they are my enemies, all of them

So we find some of them saying 'I have tried many times, repeatedly, to turn my soul away from committing these specific acts of disobedience but my efforts have failed.'

Another one says: 'I tried to get my soul to perform acts of obedience (to Allaah), good and righteous deeds but I am not able to remain firm upon them, I leave them so quickly.'

And we hear a third one say: 'I have repented from many evil actions and promised myself that I would not commit them again. However after the passing of time and being occupied much it did not take long before I returned to them. In fact I fell into others and increased in them.'

If we were to look at the condition of these people we would realise that among the reasons for their not being able to dominate and control their souls and not being able to remain firm upon what they have promised themselves is their lack of striving against their souls. In fact they have left the fetters and reins for the soul so that it leads them and plays with them however it wills. The soul is such that if it is not fought against and controlled it commands its possessor to commit evil and obscene deeds. These people, because they have not fought against their souls and controlled them in that which Allaah loves and is pleased with, are not able to remain constant in their (good) actions. For this reason it is necessary for them to control their souls for Allaah's pleasure and His obedience. Not that it should control them and as a result destroy them

It is vital that a person launches a war against his soul. One which is not haphazard or aimless but rather a firm and determined one in which he uses the weapons of faith (eemaan), sincerity to Allaah (ikhlaas), patience (sabr) and supplication (du'a). He uses them until he is able to overcome this mischievous enemy which is concealed between the two sides of his body [the soul, which commands the evil]. As a result he tames and pacifies it and makes it obedient, humble and submissive to the command of Allaah.

For this reason we find that Ibn al-Qayyim (rh) says: 'Since the jihaad against the enemies of Allaah outwardly (i.e. physically) is a branch of the jihaad of the servant against his own soul for the sake of Allaah...'

The jihaad that is greater and mightier than the jihaad against the disbelievers and pagans is the jihaad of a person against his own soul for the sake of Allaah, just as the Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu alaihi wasallam) said: "The Mujaahid is the one who struggles against his own soul in Allaah's obedience." [Tirmidhee who said it was Hasan Saheeh and Al-Albaanee said: 'Its isnaad is good']

And when a person is not able to struggle against his own soul and overcome it in that which Allaah loves, he will not be able to fight against the external enemy, nor overcome it. How can he, when he is defeated and weak, both mentally and spiritually, and cannot even gain control of his own feeble soul?

Ten Lessons Ibn al-Mubarak Taught Us

'Abdullah bin al-Mubarak (died 181 AH) was a scholar known for simultaneously combining numerous traits of virtue. In fact, his friends would sit and count all of the good things that were part of his character and personality. adh-Dhahabi related that they said: "Let's sit and count the good traits that Ibn al-Mubarak has." So, they ended up listing: "Knowledge, Fiqh, literature, grammar, language, zuhd, eloquence, poetry, praying at night, worship, Hajj, Jihad, bravery, instinct, strength, speaking little in what doesn't concern him, fairness, and lack of conflict with his companions."

Reading through his life story, one sees exactly this and cannot help but to derive brief yet heavy lessons from how this man lived.

1- No matter how bad you think you are, you can always become better.

In 'Tartib al-Madarik' (1/159), al-Qadi 'Iyad mentioned that Ibn al-Mubarak was asked about the circumstances in which he began studying. He replied: "I was a youth who drank wine and loved music and singing while engaging in these filthy acts. So, I gathered some friends to one of my gardens where there were sweet apples, and we ate and drank until we passed out while drunk. At the end of the night, I woke up and picked up the stringed 'oud and began singing:

Isn't it time that you had mercy on me * And we rebel against those who criticize us?

And I was unable to pronounce the words as I intended. When I tried again, the 'oud began speaking to me as if it were a person, saying the verse: {"Isn't it time for the hearts of those who believe to be affected by Allah's reminder?"} [al-Hadid; 16] So, I said: "Yes, O Lord!" And I smashed the oud, spilled the wine, and my repentance with all its realities came by the grace of Allah, and I turned towards knowledge and worship."

2 - You should associate with honorable people.

In 'Sifat as-Safwah' (2/323), Ibn al-Jawzi mentioned: "Ibn al-Mubarak's home in Marw was vast. It measured fifty square yards. There was no person known for knowledge, worship, manhood, or high status in Marw except that you saw him in this house."

3 - You should be a helpful guest.

In 'Sifat as-Safwah' (2/324), it is narrated that when an-Nadr bin Muhammad's son got married, he invited Ibn al-Mubarak, "and when he arrived, Ibn al-Mubarak got up to serve the guests. an-Nadr did not leave him and swore that he would tell him to leave until he finally sat down."

4 - You should give money to the poor.

In 'Sifat as-Safwah' (2/327), Ibn al-Jawzi mentions that Ibn al-Mubarak "would spend a hundred thousand dirhams a year on the poor."

5 - You should always return borrowed items to their owners.

In 'Sifat as-Safwah' (2/329), al-Hasan bin 'Arafah said that 'Abdullah bin al-Mubarak told him: "I borrowed a pen from someone in Sham, and I intended to return it to its owner. When I arrived in Marw (in Turkmenistan! ), I saw that I still had it with me. Abu 'Ali (al-Hasan's nickname), I went all the way back to Sham to return the pen to its owner!"

6 - You should be brave, and hide your good deeds:

In 'Sifat as-Safwah' (2/329), 'Abdah bin Sulayman said: "We were on an expedition in the lands of the Romans with 'Abdullah bin al-Mubarak. We met the enemy, and when the two armies met, a man came out from their side calling for a duel. One of our men went out to him and dueled with him for an hour, injuring him and killing him. Another came out, and he killed him. He called for another duel, and another man came out. They dueled for an hour, and he injured and killed him as well. The people gathered around this man, and I was with them, and saw that he was covering his face with his sleeve. I took the edge of his sleeve and pulled it away to find that it was 'Abdullah bin al-Mubarak," and he made him swear that he wouldn't reveal his identity until the day he died.

7 - You should have a tender heart.

In 'Sifat as-Safwah' (2/330), al-Qasim bin Muhammad said: "We were on a journey with Ibn al-Mubarak, and I was always asking myself: what is so special about this man that he is so famous? If he prays, so do we. If he fasts, so do we. If he fights, so do we. If he makes Hajj, so do we.

One night, we spent the night in a house travelling on the way to Sham. The lamp went out, and some of us woke up. So, he took the lamp outside to light it, and stayed outside for a while. When he came back in with the lamp, I caught a glimpse of Ibn al-Mubarak's face, and saw that his beard was wet with his tears. I said to myself: "This fear of Allah is what has made this man better than us. When the lamp went out and we were in darkness, he remembered the Day of Resurrection. ""

8 - You should be generous to your friends.

In 'Sifat as-Safwah' (2/329), Isma'il bin 'Ayyash said: "I don't know of a single good trait except that Allah has placed it in 'Abdullah bin al-Mubarak. My friends told me that they were travelling with him from Egypt to Makkah, and he was serving them khabis (a sweet flour dish) while he was fasting the entire trip."

9 - You should not give in to Satan's whispers.

In 'Tartib al-Madarik' (1/159), it is related that Ibn al-Mubarak was making ablution, and Satan came to him and said: "You did not wipe over this part of your body." Ibn al-Mubarak said: "I did." Satan said: "No, you didn't." So, Ibn al-Mubarak said: "You are the one making the claim, and you must therefore bring proof to back the claim up."

10 - You should sincerely pray for people to accept Islam.

In 'Tartib al-Madarik' (1/162), it is related that al-Hasan bin 'Isa bin Sirjis would walk by Ibn al-Mubarak, and he was a Christian. Ibn al-Mubarak asked who he was, and was told: "He is a Christian." So, Ibn al-Mubarak said: "O Allah, grant him Islam." So, Allah answered his supplication, and al-Hasan became an excellent Muslim, and he travelled to seek knowledge and became one of the scholars of the Ummah."

A strong faith unveils itself in strong hardships.

Iman Ibn ul Jawzee

Translated from Sayd ul Khatir , Pg. 354

The believer is not one who performs the ordained religious duties superficially and avoids what is forbidden only, but he is one whose faith is absolute, with no objections what so ever arising in his heart and no obsession dwelling in his/her soul. The more his faith grows and the more his/her submission strengthens. He could pray and not see a trace of and answer to his/her prayers, yet he does not change because he knows that he/she is owned by the One who deals with him/her in what ever way he chooses. For if and objection was to arise in his/her heart, he/she then forsakes the role of the slave and takes on the role of a protestor such as that of Ibless.

A strong faith unveils itself in strong hardships. A believer is seen in Yahya, son Zakariyya, a fine example. He was killed by a tyrant who confronted him, yet he (swt), who made him a prophet did not intervene nor defend him. Similarly all the tyranny that be felled the prophets and the believers was not held back from them. If one goes to think that divinity cannot answer for thee then one is an unbeliever. However if one believes that divinity can answer for them but choose not to, and that God (swt)

can make the believers go hungry while infidels are full and inflict the believers with sickness and grant the infidels health, then one is only left with submission to the Owner even when tormented or scourched. Jacob cried for eighty years when Joseph son of Jacob (pbuh) was gone, he never gave up; all he said when his other sons was gone is "May Allaah bring all of them back to me"Moses (pbuh) prayed against Pharoaoh , who killed children and crucified magicians and cut their hands, for 40 years before he was answered. In such submission the intense of one's strong faith is manifested not in mere rak'ats. So many of those who glorify Qadar were afflicted with tribulations and this did not increase them except in submission and pleasure (with their Lord), and there lies an explanation of the meaning of His words, "Allaah is pleased with them" (Qur'aan, 5:119 and elsewhere). Al-Hasan Al-Basree said :people are the same in health but when hardship befalls they show distinction.

"This is a Day on which the truthful will profit from their truth: theirs are Gardens under which rivers flow (in Paradise) - they shall abide therein forever. Allāh is pleased with them and they with Him. That is the great success (Paradise). (Al-Ma'idah 5:119)

So how is it I see your scholars dying yet the ignorant amongst you not learning?

It is reported that Abû Al-Dardâ` - Allâh be pleased with him – used to say, “Learn knowledge before it is taken way, and it is taken away by its people (scholars) being taken away. The scholar and the student are partners in good and there is no good in any other people. The richest of men is the knowledgeable man whose knowledge is needed: he benefits those who need him and if done without, he benefits himself with the knowledge Allâh ‘azza wa jalla has placed with him. So how is it I see your scholars dying yet the ignorant amongst you not learning? I fear that the predecessor will depart and the successor will not learn. If the scholar studies, he only increases in knowledge, and he does not take anything away from knowledge. And if the ignorant studies, he will find knowledge firm and established. So how is it that I see you full up with food, yet starved of knowledge?”

Ibn ‘Abd Al-Barr, Jâmi’ Bayân Al-‘Ilm wa Fadlihi Vol. 2 p233.

the importance of sisterhood in islam

When is the last time you told someone 'I love you for the sake of Allaah'?
Insha'Allaah these aayaat and ahadeeth will remind you about the special bond
between us sisters.


Allaah says in the Qur'aan:
( The Believers are but a single brotherhood . . .) [Qur'an 49:10]

'There are three things that whoever attains them will find
the sweetness of faith: if Allah (subhaanahu wa Ta'alaa) and His Messenger are
dearer to him than anyone or anything else; if he loves a person
solely for the sake of Allah (subhaanahu wa Ta'alaa); and if he would hate to
return to kufr after Allah (subhaanahu wa Ta'alaa) has rescued him from it,
as much as he would hate to be thrown into the Fire.'
[Bukhari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 1/49, Kitab al-iman,
bab halawat al-iman]

'A man went to visit a brother of his in another village. Allah
(subhaanahu wa Ta'alaa) sent an angel to wait for him on the road.
When the man came along, the angel asked him, `Where are you headed?'
He said, `I am going to visit a brother of mine who lives in this village.'
The angel asked, `Have you done him any favour (for which you are now
seeking repayment)?' He said, `No, I just love him for the sake of Allah
(SWT).' The angel told him, `I am a messenger to you from Allah (SWT),
sent to tell you that He loves you as you love your brother for His
sake.'' [Sahih Muslim, 16/124, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab,
bab fadl al-hubb fi-Allah]

'Believers are like a structure, parts of which support other parts.'
[Bukhari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 13/47, Kitab al-birr
wa'l-silah, bab ta'awun al-mu'minin wa tarahumuhum]

'The believers, in their mutual friendship, mercy and affection,
are like one body: if any part of it complains, the rest of the body
will also stay awake in pain.' [Ibid]

'No two people who love one another for the sake of Allah (subhaanahu
wa Ta'alaa), or for the sake of Islam, will let the first minor offence
of either of them come between them.' [Reported by Bukhari in
al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/493, Bab hijrah al-Muslim]

'Do not break off ties with one another, do not turn away from one
another, do not hate one another, do not envy one another.
Be brothers, as Allah (SWT) has commanded you.' [Sahih Muslim,
16/120, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab tahrim al-zann
wa'l-tajassus wa'l-tanafus]

'Do not envy one another, do not outbid one another (in order to inflate
prices), do not hate one another, do not turn away from one another,
and do not enter into a transaction when others have already entered
into it. O servants of Allah (SWT), be brothers. A Muslim is the brother
of a Muslim. He does not oppress him, humiliate him or look down upon him.
Taqwa is here' - and so saying, he pointed to his chest three times.
'It is evil enough for a man to look down upon his Muslim brother.
The whole of a Muslim's being is sacred to another Muslim - his blood,
his wealth and his honour are inviolable.' [Sahih Muslim, 16/120,
Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab tahrim zulm al-Muslim
wa khadhaluhu wa ihtiqarahu]

'Your smiling at your brother is an act of charity (sadaqah).'
[Reported by Tirmidhi, 3/228, Abwab al-birr, 36. He said it
is hasan gharib]

'The believer is the mirror of his brother. If he sees any fault in him,
he corrects it.' [Reported by Bukhari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/333,
Bab al-Muslim mir'ah akhihi]

Anas (RAA) said that a man was with the Prophet (sallallaahu alayhi wa
sallam), when another man passed by. The first man said,
'O Messenger of Allah, indeed I truly love this man.' The Prophet
(sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam)) asked him, 'Have you let him know that?'
He said, 'No.' The Prophet (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) said, 'Tell him.'
He caught up with him and told him, 'Truly I love you for the sake of Allah
(subnaahahu wa Ta'alaa),' and the man said, 'May Allah (subhaanahu wa Ta'alaa)
love you who loves me for His sake.' [Reported with a sahih isnad by Abu
Dawud, 4/452, Kitab al-adab, bab akhbar al-rajul bi mahabbatihi ilayh]

ilmun yaqeenun wa ikhlaasun wa sidqu kama,mahabbahun wa inqiyaadin wa qabooli laha Wadheeda thaaminuha al kufraanun minta bima, fee al-ilaahi min al ashyaaee qaduliha

knowledge certainty and sincerity and truthfulness with love and surrender and acceptance to this word, and increase the eight one which is disbelief from you of with what is worshipped other than Allah from the things that are worshipped.

Conditions for the Acceptance of Actions

Imaam Muhammad Ibn Saalih al-'Uthaymeen (d.1421H) - rahimahullaah - said, “Sincerity (ikhlaas) towards Allaah means that the person desires by his worship closeness to Allaah the Exalted and reaching His Abode of Nobility (i.e. Paradise), such that the servant must be sincere towards Allaah the Exalted in his intended purpose. He must be sincere towards Allaah the Exalted in his love. He must be sincere towards Allaah in his exaltation. He must be sincere to Allaah the Exalted outwardly and inwardly. He does not seek anything with his worship, except for the Face of Allaah the Exalted and reaching His Abode of Nobility.” [1] Stated al-’Allaamah Muhammad Ibn Saalih al-’Uthaymeen (d.1421H) – rahimahullaah, “And in order that it will be known – O brothers – that al-mutaaba’ah cannot be actualized, except when the action is in agreement with the Sharee’ah in six affairs: The First: as-Sabab (reason, motive); So when the person worships Allaah with act of worship that is accompanied by a motive that is not legislated by the Sharee’ah, then it is an innovation that is rejected back to its doer. An example of that is when some of the people commemorate the twenty-seventh night of Rajab under the pretence that it was the night in which the Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) ascended. So tahajjud (the night Prayer) is worship. However, when it is accompanied with this motive, it becomes an innovation. This is because this action of worship is built upon a motive that has not been confirmed in the Sharee’ah. And this description – the conformity of the worship to the Sharee’ah in motive – is an important affair that clarifies many innovations from amongst those that are thought to be from the Sunnah, yet they are not from the Sunnah. The Second: al-Jins (type); so it is inevitable that the act of worship be in conformity to the Sharee’ah in its jins (type). So if the person worships with an act of worship whose type is not legislated, then it is not accepted. An example of that is if a man were to slaughter a horse, then this sacrifice would not be correct, because it has opposed the Sharee’ah in the type. So the blood sacrifices cannot be done, except with cattle, grazing livestock, camels, cows and sheep. The Third: al-Qadr (quantity); so if the person increases in the Prayer that is obligatory, then we say that this is an innovation that is not accepted, because it opposes the Sharee’ah in quantity. With all the more reason, if the person prays the noon Prayer for example as five units, then his Prayer is not correct by agreement. The Fourth: al-Kayfiyyah (manner, mode); so if a man performs ablution, and he begins with washing the feet, then he wipes his head, then he washes his hands, then his face, then we say that his ablution is null and void, because it opposes the Sharee’ah in manner. The Fifth: az-Zamaan (time); so if the person slaughters in the first days of Dhul-Hijjah, then his blood sacrifice will not be accepted due it opposing the Sharee’ah in time. And I have heard that some of the people slaughter sheep during the month of Ramadaan in order to draw closer to Allaah with blood sacrifice. So this action in this manner is an innovation, because there is nothing with regards to drawing closer to Allaah with slaughtering, except for blood sacrifice, gifts and the ’aqeeqah. As for slaughtering in Ramadaan along with the belief that one will attain the reward of slaughtering, such as the blood sacrifice in ’Eedul-Adhaa, or slaughtering for the sake of meat, then this is permissible. The Sixth: al-Makaan (place); so if a man performs i’tikaaf in other than a mosque, then his i’tikaaf is not correct. And that is because the i’tikaaf cannot occur, except in the mosques. And if a woman says, ‘I wish to perform i’tikaaf in the musallaa (place of Prayer) in the house,’ then her i’tikaaf is not correct due to opposition of the Sharee’ah in place. And from the examples of that is if a man desires to perform tawaaf. So he finds that the area of tawaaf has become too confined and he finds that whatever is around it has become too confined. So he starts to perform tawaaf from behind the mosque, then his tawaaf will not be correct, because the place of the tawaaf is the house. So the act of worship cannot be considered a righteous action, except if two conditions are fulfilled with regards to it, the first is al-ikhlaas (sincerity) and the second is al-mutaaba’ah (following the Prophet). And al-mutaaba’ah cannot be fulfilled, except with the six affairs that have been previously mentioned.” [2] Footnotes: [1]: Refer to Majmoo’ul-Fataawaa (7/112) of Ibnul-’Uthaymeen. [2]: Refer to Majmoo’ul-Fataawaa (5/253-254) of Ibnul-’Uthaymeen.

Shaykh Muhammad bin Saalih al-`Uthaymeen

Fiqh Ad-Dawah

Aqeedah of a Daa’iyah

The word Aqeedah comes from the root word A-QA-DAH.

A knot that cannot be broken and if this knot is broken, then there will be a consequence.

Aqeed – A very, very strong connection.

The Arabs of the past always wanted the end of the word to be soft. The rule is that the more letters in a word, results in more meaning. Aqeed becomes Aqeedah, thus the extra meaning is that the connection is stronger and the individual has certainty in what they believe.

Definition of Aqeedah


The belief in your heart (certain belief) in what RasulAllah sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam came with.

Knowledge of Aqeedah - What a Daa’iyah needs to know?

1. Tawheed

• Rububiyah – Knowing Allah and his lordship
• Asma was Siffat – Allah’s names and Attributes
• Uloohiyah (Tawheed al Ibaadah) – That there is no one worthy of worship except Allah.

1. Prophethood and the Books

• Belief in Prophet Muhammedsal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam as a prophet and the final messenger of Allah. If an individual believes in RasulAllah sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam then they will believe in Allah Subhana’wa tala. You need to know the prophets and the messengers and the special qualities of RasulAllah sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam.

1. The Ghaib (unseen)

• Day of Judgement
• Paradise and Hellfire

• Angels & Jinns and anything, which is related to the unseen world

1. Qadr and Predestination

• Allah Subhana’wa tala’s will and the Humans will
• Allah Subhana’wa tala’s knowledge etc.

1. Al Imamah (Khalifah) and the Jammah

• The khalifah’s right and how the muslims deal with him
• His selection and what the muslims do if there is no khalifah

1. Al Akhlaaq (The manners and morals of a muslim)

• Best Aqeedah + No manners =No one will accepts it
• Corrupt Aqeedah + Best manners = People will accept it, it depends how you put it

How you represent yourself and represent Islam makes the difference.

• Bad heart + Correct Aqeedah = Paradise one day
• Good heart + Corrupt Aqeedah = Hellfire

Fiqh Ad Da'wah

Fiqh – The clear and the right understanding

Ad Da'wah – Calling or inviting somebody to something

Da'wah – We have to make people worship Allah Subhana’wa ta'ala and bring them closer to Allah, because Allah Subhana’wa Ta'ala is the source to all good. When we bring them closer to Allah Subhana’wa ta'ala we bring good to them. We should command people to do good and forbid them from doing evil.

The virtues of Da'wah

• ‘Who is better then the one who calls to Allah’
• The best title you can be given is the title of a daa’iyah
• Da'wah was the mission of the prophets so we should aim to be like the prophets. They were callers to Allah Subhana’wa ta'ala, so we should also want to be a daa’iyah.
• When you teach people good, you share with the reward if they carry it out and they don’t lose any of the reward.
• Da'wah is the main reason for our community to be strong, without da'wah society will collapse. Also, when we live for our self our life is short, but when we live for Allah Subhana’wa ta'ala, then our life will be longer. The da'wah of this ummah has been favoured over other nations, because we are a nation that orders good and forbids evil. Part of our Shahadah is ‘la ilaha illalah, ’ to complete our Shahadah and be a true Muwahid we have to deliver the message that there is no-one worthy of worship except Allah.

The way of giving Dawah

1) Your intention cannot justify your way of giving da'wah, neither your goal to justify a bad way.

You cannot establish a noble goal using a dirty way; your da'wah has to be Islamic, and legal.
For example:

• Hire a non-muslim model to wear hijab, to show a non-muslim wearing hijab.
• Invite Rabbi and priest to jummah and divide jummah in three parts. The sheik leads the salah, the rabbi does the khutbah and the priest makes dua. They do this to show that Muslims are tolerant of other faiths.

Both are wrong, but there goals are good, however they have gone the wrong way about it.


2) You da'wah can be silent and doesn’t have to always be verbal.

Your actions will speak for themselves, people may not see you speak about Islam but your actions will reveal a lot about you.
For example:

• A Muslim man is walking to the car and its raining, he sees a non-Muslim women getting wet as it’s raining to much for her to get to her car, so he gives her, his umbrella. After that she wants to thank him and tries to find a gift for him, so she searches the net. The Muslim is of Arab origin and whilst searching the net she is exposed to Islam and becomes Muslim, Alhamdulillah.
• A massive picture of the kabah in your office can initiate a conversation.
• E-cards
• People seeing you prayer

3) Your role is to make people love Islam, your approach should be nice, kind, and loving, your approach should be such, that it doesn’t scare people away.

Always smile, as RasulAllah sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam smiled the most. You have to make the task easy for the people and simplify it for them.

4) Have Gentleness in your Da'wah and be merciful to the people.

Every person has dignity and no-one wants to be educated, so teach them in such a way that they don’t know your educating them and this can be done by gentleness.

It is reported from Abu Hurayrah radiAllahu anhu that the RasulAllah sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam said: ‘Indeed Allah is gentle and loves gentleness and gives due to gentleness that which he does not give harshness’.1

Gentleness leads to friendship and love and people are more likely to accept it, whereas through it’s opposite ill feelings develop and you da'wah can become useless.

From the Qur'an:

“{It is part of the mercy of Allah that you deal gently with them. Were you severe or harsh hearted, they would have went away from you: so pass over (their faults), and ask (Allah’s) forgiveness for them; and consult them in the affairs (of the moment). Then, when you have taken a decision, place your trust in Allah. For Allah loves those that place their trust (in him).}” ~Surat Al Imran 3:159

5) You should use different techniques in your da'wah.

Prophet Nuh alayhis salam gave dawah in private and public, group da'wah and one to one conversations. You should try to use these types and try to develop a personal relationship with them, as this will make your da'wah more effective. Having a one to one talk with someone is very effective as it becomes more personal and you can get to the core of the problem.

This can be done in a number of ways: stories, but don’t only tell stories.

Another way can be writing an email or giving a gift, this is costly but leaves lasting effects.

Mix between the different ways, RasulAllah sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam would give reminders, but not so much so that it would have an effect. Always remember what you may like, another may not, so find out what they like and use that method on them.
6) Everything you do has to be based on the Qur'an and Sunnah.

Rule: When ever you want to do anything, you have to ensure your method is correct according to the Qur'an and Sunnah, because if it’s not then there is danger of falling into haram or innovation.

The Sunnah can be defined in this way:

• Did the Prophet Muhammed sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam practice this? If not was there a reason preventing him from doing so? If there was a reason preventing him, then your allowed to do it. For example we are allowed to use a microphone, because it didn’t exist in the time of RasulAllah sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam. Also why didn’t RasulAllah sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam compile the Quran, because he didn’t know when the revelation would stop.

For example:


• In the time of the Tab’een, the people would leave before the Eid khutbah, so the khalifah said he would do it before the Eid salah. Is this allowed?

• The scholars said No, but why? The said no, because in the time of RasulAllah sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam, the Bedouins would leave after the Eid salah and the Prophet sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam didn’t do anything, so neither are we allowed to do anything, nor any other person.

7) You have to think out of the box and find new ways of giving da'wah without changing the content.

For example; dvd’s, PowerPoint presentations, internet, conferences etc. You need to always keep in mind that communities may change, generations may change and you will have to adapt to them but the message remains the same.

What differentiates your da'wah? The locality of your da'wah may make a lot of difference in how you present the message, each community is different, they have there own cultures and habits and Islam has to be presented to them in a different way that suits them, but with the same message.

8) When we do our da'wah we should do our job to the best of our ability, with Ihsaan and the results have to be outstanding.

We should always want to improve and be precise in our da'wah and actions.

The Messenger of Allah sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam, said;

“Allah has commanded that everything (one does) they should do it with excellence (ihsan). When you sacrifice, sacrifice well. Sharpen your knife and make it easy for the animal to be slaughtered” (Muslim)

The lessons we learn from this hadith are that we should not just aim to be ‘good,’ we should be outstanding! This is what is required of a Muslim especially one active in da'wah, this should put this excellence in everything that you do.

You should:

• Plan Ahead and be proactive in your da'wah rather than reactive.
• Always do shoorah and consult others who have different experiences.
• Allocate job roles and don’t do all the work yourself.
• Have good leadership, as this will affect all the work that you do.
• Have self-sufficient da'wah and don’t rely on people, you should have a way of generating money.
• Also there are many Muslim organisations, we should support them and not destroy them.

9) Don’t ignore issues.

We should address people and talk on behalf of the Muslims, address issues such as 9/11 and 7/7, but make sure what your saying is correct and that it is said with wisdom.

10) Have Hikmah (wisdom) in your da'wah.

Definition of Hikmah: To put things to where they belong, so you have a good reason to ordain it.


Where they belong – Justice is to ordain it, this is wisdom


For example:

• A Muslim man sells alcohol and he comes to your house, so you tell him to get out, he may deserve it but, but what is your purpose of throwing him out, Revenge, if this is the case then you don’t have ikhlaas. The purpose is to make him change, so he will stop selling alcohol, but if this is your reaction, he may retaliate and say ‘that’s it, forget these muslims’ This way has no wisdom unless you knew this would make him change.

You have to have wisdom in your da'wah if you want to be successful.

Characteristics you should have as a Da'i:

• Generosity – when this is for the sake of Allah it is very effective.

RasulAllah sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam, said: “Anyone who believes in Allah and the Last day (of Judgement) should not harm his neighbour. Anyone who believes in v should host his guest generously. And anyone who believes in Allah and the Last day should say what is good or keep quiet” ~Sahih Bukhari, Volume 8, Book 73, Number 47

• Smile

Abdullah ibn Haarith, radi Allahu anhu said: “I have never seen anyone who smiled more than Allah’s Messenger sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam”

• Be humble – He who serves the group is just like the leader of the group

From the Qu'ran:


“And give glad tidings to the humble. Those whose hearts, when Allah is mentioned, are filled with fear, who show patient perseverance over their afflictions, keep up regular prayer, and spend of charity out of what We have bestowed upon them” ~22:35

• Give others what you want for your self – This is a very high level of iman, it is easy to say but hard to practice.

Allah’s Messenger sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam, said: ‘You will be treated the way you treat others”

• Always to try to help people at work or when they are in trouble.

Allah’s Messenger sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam, said: “Allah is at the assistance of a person, so long as that person is at the assistance of their brother”

• Always be self-sufficient in financial matters
  
• Don’t have bad manners

RasulAllah sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam, said: “A believer may achieve the status of one who fasts during the night regularly and spends the night regularly in prayer, through his good manners”


Don’t slander, cheat, backbite, envy people, hate them or be miserly, as this are bad characteristics that you don’t want, also they can give you nasty results.

• Be honest

Allah’s Messenger sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam, said: “ Be honest, for verily honesty leads to righteousness, and righteousness leads to paradise”


You should live your life in a way, that if someone was to open the door at any moment you would have nothing to hide.

• Be patient

From the Qur'an:{Never lose hope in the mercy of Allah} ~ Al Ahzab 39:53


From The Qur'an:{Verily, with every difficulty is ease. Truly, with every difficulty is ease} ~ Surat Nashr 94:5-6

• Don’t be like a candle, switching on and off.

You have to practice what you preach and be a role model, also you don’t have to be perfect to give da'wah, so don’t worry if you are making mistakes, keep developing by gaining knowledge and reviewing yourself and insha'Allah you will improve as time goes on.

‘When trouble touches man, he cries to his Lord, turning to him in repentance, but when he bestows a favour upon him as from Himself, (man) forgets what he cried and prayed for before, and sets up partners with Allah, thus misleading others from Allah’s Path. Say, “Enjoy your blasphemy for a little while: verily you are (one) of the companions of the fire” ~39-8

1. Be steadfast in Islam

‘Now then, for that (reason), call (then to faith)’ and stand steadfast as you are commanded…’ ~ Surah Al Shoorah (42):15

1. Be aware of the fitnah of men and women

Gentleness in Dawah

The Prophet صلى الله عليه و سلم said:
“Indeed Allaah is Rafeeq (Gentle), He loves rifq (gentleness) in all affairs.” [4]
and,
“Verily rifq does not exist in something except that it beautifies it; and it is not taken out of something except that it harms it.”[5]

This is the meaning of what Rasool صلى الله عليه و سلم said regarding oneself and when dealing with the da’wah. This is what you do when you give the da’wah – give glad tidings and don’t drive the people away; give them glad tidings of what they will receive; and by your actions make it easy and not hard for them to accept it. If this is how you deal even with the kaafir (disbeliever), so how is it then with your brother – he has the highest levels of rifq. Allaah سبحانه و تعالى loves this leniency in all of the affairs and whoever loves this Deen and loves Allaah سبحانه و تعالى and loves the Messenger صلى الله عليه و سلم and loves the haqq he is upon, then he will force himself to leave his shiddah (harshness) and he will take the means of leniency because of his love for the Deen and the Messenger صلى الله عليه و سلم and the haqq that he is upon.

[4] Reported as part of the following hadeeth in Saheeh al-Bukhaaree (#6528) and Saheeh Muslim, Kitaab as-Salaam (#2165)

استأذن رهط من اليهود على النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم فقالوا: السام عليك، فقلت: بل عليكم السام واللعنة، فقال: (يا عائشة، إن الله رفيق يحب الرفق في الأمر كله). قلت: أولم تسمع ما قالوا: قال: (قلت: وعليكم)

[5] Shaykh al-Albaani رحمه الله says Saheeh in Saheeh al-Jaami’
(#5654)

ما كان الرفق في شيء إلا زانه ولا نزع من شيء إلا شانه

^

taken from a lecture by Shaykh Rabee ibn Haadi al-Madkhali

"The Husband Should Have Some Fiqh..."

'Questions on Marriage'

By Shaykh Mashhoor Salmaan

(one of the students of Shaykh Al-Albaani)

Translated by: Hisham Assing

Question: What is the best way to solve marital problems?

Answer: It is not possible to solve marital problems except that a man understands that his wife is weak. Or that Allaah settles that which occurs between them with regards to their differences. The issue is not that the husband is always correct, and if the wife is correct and the husband is incorrect, then this erodes his masculinity or his authority, no.

'And in whatsoever you differ, the decision thereof is with Allaah.'

(Ash-Shuraa: 10)

'But no, by your Lord, they can have no Faith, until they make you a judge in all disputes between them, and find in themselves no resistance against your decisions, and accept (them) with full submission.'

(An-Nisaa': 65)

'And if you differ in anything amongst yourselves, refer it to Allaah and His Messenger, if you believe in Allaah and in the Last Day.'

(An-Nisaa': 59)

The premise of the husband is that he should have some fiqh, and that he knows when an how to solve matters. It is quite possible that problems can occur in the house. So since the man is one who has the authority he should remain calm until these problems are resolved. Thereafter he should use his wisdom, masculinity, and counsel. What is always blameworthy is harsh, severe interactions. I would inform you of something that I hope Allaah would make it a benefit for us all.

The secret to a husband being successful in his interactions with his wife is for him to compensate for her weakness. A woman is weak and emotional. Hence, if you want to make her a happy wife then make amends that is in accordance with her weakness, and always make her feel that you are in constant need of her and you cannot do without her. Fulfill her emotional needs, comfort her feelings. When the Prophet informed us that the woman is 'Deficient in her intelligence.' , he did not meant it to be a belittlement of women, however what he was illustrating to us is how to deal with a woman. The most miserable man is the one who whenever a dispute occurs between him and his wife he says to her, 'let's leave off emotions and deal with the issue based on intelligence.' What does it mean that she is 'Deficient in her intelligence?' That is, her intelligence is deficient in comparison to her emotions, for her emotions are very strong. So you men are deficient in emotions. You have full intellect because intelligence is something that is relative. The woman is deficient in her intelligence and the man is deficient in his emotions. So Allaah created males with faculties that suits his being and He created females with faculties that suits her nature. This is why both spouses would not obtain amicability until they both return to the deen of Allaah, and that they both know their rights in the deen of Allaah.

So therefore whenever there occurs problems between you all and you want to advise your wife, the most important thing is that you first of all sympathise with her feelings and emotions until she becomes calm, then you begin to counsel. How easy can a woman be. At the same time how complicated is she! Because her emotions are ever changing. And from the mercy of our Lord to the woman is that He made her heart ever changing, whereby if she is divorced, the second husband becomes the most beloved, and if he dies the and remarries, the third is the most beloved to her, and this is in accordance with the legislation of Allaah.

A woman would be just fine with her father, however by seeing that particular man once, she forgets about her father, her brother...and then you become her priority. So fulfill her emotional needs and you will find peace and relaxation.

Husbands make certain mistakes, and one of the most serious mistakes they make is that they treat their wives like how they treat another man, or they speak to them as they speak to their mothers or sisters; this is wrong. The wife is a creation that is weak and you were also created weak, 'And man was created weak.' What surah is this ayah mentioned? An-Nisaa'. And what context did it come? The man's necessity for a woman. You are in need of her, you're weak because desires within men are strong. So you compensate your weakness through her, and therefore let her compensate for her weakness through you. And should never forget to offer her words of advice because husbands are either neglectful, unconcerned with the affairs of their wives whereby they let them do whatever they want by failing to command or prohibit them, or they are harsh and extreme whereby all they do is complain, criticize, find fault, and compare their wives with other pretty women, especially if they watch cable, this is an affliction. Be contended with what Allaah has provided for you as this is your choice, and I think by these words of advice a husband can correctly guide his wife.

(Transcribed from the weekly Question and Answer session by Shaykh Mashhoor Salmaan: 11/25/06) Al-Bukhaaree (hadeeth nos. 294)